Sunday 20 June 2010

West Ham Till I Diet

As well as being the UK's premier political blogger with 14 trillion unique visitor numbers and 8 kazillion page views every 3 minutes, I also write stuff about my beloved West Ham. This mix of insightful right wing political nous and being an Irons zealot is nothing new. Think of me as a sort of Alf Garnett for the new Millennium.

The England term were kak against Algeria (technical football term). We need to get a bit of the 1966 spirit in there and use West Ham to form the spine of the team. And the floppy bits as well. Only players with a West Ham connection or who are very, very good can play. Therefore my team for the Slovenia showdown is (in a groundbreaking 3-6-7-3 formation):

James, Green, Parkes: Johnson, Upson, Rio (even on one leg), Bonds, Alvin Martin, Dicks: Joe Cole, Frank Lampard, His Dad, Parker, Brooking, Devonshire, Matty Holmes: Defoe, Alan Taylor, Hurst.

You may note that I have not selected the one World Class player that England possess, who even though he has been so anonymous in the first two games that the National Missing Person's Helpline have been called in to try and locate him, surely has to play in a game that we must win. It is almost as if I am trying to deliberately be controversial to provoke debate.

4 comments:

  1. I really need to know how many of the players are gay, Iain. You are gay, right?

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  2. Old Holborn said...
    I really need to know how many of the players are gay, Iain. You are gay, right?
    ____________________________

    Gay, right and slightly whorish.

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  3. No chanelling of Bobby Moore?

    Shame on you, Fale. Back of the class.

    "Third most popular football blog" my Arsenal. Though that claim is rather like almost scoring a goal. Or preventing one from being scored.

    Ahem...

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  4. I will make no comment on my gaiety.

    I considered picking Bobby Moore as even dead he has more pace than Alvin Martin. But his last two games for Fulham were poor and even though he is also World Class, I am applying the same criteria to Moore as to Rooney.

    My football blog posts are read by more people than watch the World Cup. Than exist in the world even. I am so football it hurts.

    ReplyDelete